WhatTheFcuk

Friday, October 05, 2007
4:36 PM

An early book out for today.

It somehow gave me sometime to reflect these few busy mths

It gave me a chance to slow down my footstep. Just for that few hours.

But seriously, it made me ponder for quite a bit.

I've been telling myself, I'm doing all these because I want to have a better future life.

I want to explore what's my real interest lies at.

For these few months, I thought, I really thought that I managed my time well.

But, I didn't.

I place the priority of earning too high.

I hardly have time to even have a proper meal.

The bare minimum time left are just having simple dinner w my family.

thats all, thats how my weekends are gone.

I hardly catch up w some frens even though they may not want to or may not have e time to.

Initially, I feel, aiya, forget it, friends come and go. I shouldn't be so emotionally dependant on
them since they don't really cherish me.

Sometimes I even wonder if they still notice my existence on this earth.They makes me feel unwanted.wellsss..

But fortunately, there are still couple of frens who are still trying to catch up w me who I disappoint them becoz of e students. They are the ones who make me feel wanted.=)

Still, I appreciate them. Seriously.

However, now, at this moment, I really wish I can meet all of my friends. Maybe not all, most of
them I mean.

Am I really working too hard?

If I'm, what's the purpose behind it?

Is it really just for a better future and life or does it include the fear of havin a lonely life during weekends?hmmmm...

Suddenly I just feel confused.

On the way back, on train, I saw a young secondary sch couple. I suppose they're couple.haha.

Anyway, the way of communication between them is so cute.

I mean, just a little smile or positive respond from each other makes them smile till I cant see
their eyes.haha.

I don't know how to pen it down in words.

But I realise that the art of communication between human can be so simple yet complicated.

It will be damn simple if u communicate with pure innocence and soul.Just like what did the young couple do.

Just a simple smile, it makes a beautiful day for both of them.

I really miss that kind of communication, just like what I do durin sec and JC times. In fact, I
love that.

But somehow, my age doesn't allow me to do so.

Now, it seems like one have to pay for that kind of smile. Or rather that kind of smile becomes an evil smile which one might never realise till the end.

It just become more and more complicated till I start to lose myself at times like now.

Every single sentence one speak seems to have hidden meaning.

I really detest that.

Well, this is how the world works.

Regardless if one is in army or working world.

Still, I'll treat it w a =)

fcuk_off`